Dragon Age II

 Dragon Age II. Wheeee, Dragon Age II.

Now, Yahtzee is a hard act to follow, especially since he seems to mostly just say true things in the most caustic, angry sort of way possible.

And I'm just not very angry.

So ... yeah, this morning I woke up and, over breakfast, I asked Mom, "Hey, would you be terribly upset if I married a combat animation? I think I'm in love."

And she kind of stared at me for a long moment. "Backstab?" she finally asked.

The combat in Dragon Age 2 is pretty much the main and/or only thing about Dragon Age 2. Which ... isn't really bad. It is delightfully fun to wade into combat, jumping about from foe to foe like a giant, angry flea, only instead of sucking out all their blood, you're dismembering them with daggers made entirely of death. Death. Which is, yeah, win.

It's still a Bioware game, mind, so the writing is still good, it just kind of doesn't stand up well against its predecessor...s...es. And it's still a Dragon Age game, so it's still Darker and Edgier to boot.

The plot is just kinda ... there, to facilitate Hawke gleefully reducing all of his/her/its foes to a series of ever-growing, gooey red stains on the ground. Honestly, some of the dungeons got a new paint job. All in red. With some minor variation for organ color and bone.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'ma go dismember all the giant spiders, bandits, and Qunari that decide to get in my way. Life is hard as the Free Marches' only human-shaped lawnmower.