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Tuesday, January 4, 2011

An Ode to BRD

This is how it goes.

Twenty seconds in queue and a loading screen, then a groan. I'm here again.

Wait for everyone to get quests for a minute before the pull, where I nearly die to green mobs; the healer's DC'd abruptly. At least he comes back this time. It's a close thing.

Someone suggests a full clear, but everyone else just wants to skip straight to the end. Full Clear Guy leaves in a huff. We bicker briefly on whether to kill Bael'gar or the Inquisitor first, and all the new 55s are surprised when it isn't over after just the Inquisitor.

I'm lost again.

I get lost easily. I warn them up front, but they always act surprised that I'm fuzzy on how to get to the relic coffer room alone.

We don't have enough keys, anyway. Full Clear Guy shouldn't have left. We are slowly killing everything, backwards, including bosses even Full Clear Guy would have skipped.

At least it doesn't matter that I'm lost, now. As long as I keep our inexorable wave of death pointed at dwarves who are still alive, no one cares.

Ironically, skipping bosses has left us in a good position. We're killing the dwarves around the Ring of Law, having walked all the way back to the beginning on our circuitous murdering spree. It's still not quite enough, so after the spectators are dead, we jump down into the arena pit that is the Ring of Law proper.

Several bosses later, I've /ignored one of the DPS because he's just told one too many stupid penis jokes. It's a little surprising to note that he's from my server, but I smile a bit when I do it anyway. I've successfully made his queue a little bit longer.

All of the DPS die from standing in the fire on the second-to-last boss, as does the healer, and I'm left to finish the boss solo - which I do, successfully, seconds before keeling over, myself.

I stay dead at the healer's suggestion: he's not only my healer, he's my friend, and he knows I literally could not find my way back this far into the instance unaided. Besides, by the time I kill the boss, he's released and is somewhere near the Domicile as a stealthed kitty cat.

The DPS ignore the healer's suggestion, however, and somehow they end up dead. I hadn't thought we'd left enough dwarves alive to warrant such wholesale slaughter of our own group, but apparently we had. Once again, they release and run back, ignoring the healer who only wants to get this run done, he cries to me in whispers.

We end up disbanding before I even resurrect.

Thank you, BRD.

You have so enriched my Warcraft experience.

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